I can’t remember the last time I didn’t have some goals down in my journal by this time in January. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not a goals person because I think they are all going to be met. And yes, I’ve read the research on New Year’s Resolutions. For me, it’s a time of asking the Lord,
- Where do You want to take me this year?
- What do You want to do in my life?
- What hills are on the horizon that You want to take – and are inviting me to be a part of that conquest?
It’s usually a hope-filled time.
But this year…. whew. I just returned from three weeks of helping my father-in-law pass into the arms of Jesus. And yep, over Christmas and New Years – the church’s Superbowl time. Craig was flying back and forth (Colorado to Ohio- and flying right now…not a joy). He got those last meaningful moments while his dad was still coherent and not yet struggling to shed “this earthly tent we live in” – and for that I’m so grateful. But preaching only hours after his dad finally went to be with Jesus, that’s a lot. And then there’s always the “church stuff” (like conflict, hurt, criticism) that comes at the worst times.
I share all of that, not because I have a nugget of wisdom for you in it. But rather because I know that for some of you, this Christmas season had so much you didn’t anticipate. With the gifts were losses you are just now starting to come to terms with. With the joyful carols, there were songs of lament, sang only in the quietness of your own heart. But just a few days ago, Craig reminded me of this scripture from Habakkuk 3…
The Sovereign
Lord is my strength;
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
He enables me to tread on the heights.
Those deer and goats that I watch up on the cliffs as I drive into our mountains, perched precariously on what looks like a blank wall have learned to hold onto even the smallest crag or crevice. “Living by faith means standing tall on even the smallest signs of hope.”
So as I’m taking some walks and creating space for my heart to recover, writing some laments that turn to trust in my journal, and allowing myself to not have the same capacity as I normally do, I’m also starting to do some things that are helping me grab onto those smallest signs of hope.
For me, going about goal-setting as if nothing has happened would be foolish… and wouldn’t work. I’m trying to be more reflective about what I’ve been through this year as I look forward. I’m allowing God to show me how to lament in a way that is not just complaining, but redemptive, gut-level honesty that turns eventually into God-centered worship. (More on that in a later article)
Because I’m committed to turning my wrestling and struggle into something that helps you to do this ministry life better, here are some of the gut-level questions that are helping me reflect as I begin looking ahead. (Most of these are taken from a list provided by Katie at chasingvibrance.com. Some of our Alongside coaches are using it together and even with their teen and adult kids.)
YEAR END REFLECTION QUESTIONS – ALONGSIDE
